rules vs agreements

I don't like rules.
I prefer agreements.

made together
and changed together
when we grow
when we need modifying, so do our agreements

And so I don't like rules.

But I do like you. and I like to make agreements with you.

I imagine possiblities

I imagine possiblities for my life, and I pray that I choose to live stronger, more powerful love in everything I do.
I am birthing my soul into this life.  

As I sit here meditating, I wish it would not end too soon.  I wish to feel the glow of this moment for long enough.   I wish to feel it until I feel ready to move on.  

I feel so alive when I have feelings like these.  That is why  I come back to relive them again and again.   The stir cof reativity in me.  The stir working  in me.   These feelings and emotions stir everything in me and they make me feel so alive!  

Thank you spirit for making me feel alive. Thank you for meeting me here in eternity.
You bring  old friends in new skin, I feel certain.  And you have come here to love me and give me a gift.

I feel some resolve.  I can get up and walk through my day right now without feeling the burden of my desires weighing too heavily on me.
I feel desire to change the world I live in.  To hang the blinds, sweep the floors.  Take out the old and put in some new.  This stage of our lives is still young.  We are all still learning.   I gather with you new friends.   The several of you that I think of now.  And we are changing the world we live in…

I had a dream last night that I was flying

I had a dream last night that I was flying. Flying in a field. I think it was at a party, a house gathering… people were showing up and moving around the grounds. And I was out flying down one of the rows in the field. Amid the crops. It was a windy day and I was telling the people to try to fly like me, that you just run and catch the wind and let it take you.

It was quite beautiful and I know it is my heart being so happy that I am moving along…

It has been such an amazing week.

my path of evolution

Thoughts on my own personal path of evolution       October 18, 2006

I may go my own path… follow my own vision and acknowledge the depth of my already expanding soul.   I may take my own steps.   Search my own truth and acknowledge my own winding road to today and today’s understandings.

Work is Love Made Visible

This rings so true with me today.  This is my daily pursuit, and most often my experience.
I will keep this close by for the days ahead of me.  


WORK IS LOVE MADE VISIBLEReal success is achieved when you like what you do.No one can succeed in any endeavor that they don't like.If you don't love what you're doing, then don't do it.Your chances of success are directly proportionalto the degree of pleasure you derive from what you do.Do something that you have a deep personal interest in.Do something you'd enjoy spending twelve to fifteen hours a dayworking at, and the rest of the time thinking about.Don't set compensation as your goal.Find work you like and the compensation will follow.Work is not your punishment.It's your reward, your strength and your pleasure.When your vocation becomes your vacation,you'll never work another day in your life.THE DAILY GURU©2006 by Max SteingartReproduce freely but maintain © notice

listening in stillness

An Affirmation of CourageI no longer confuse what I seem to be with Who I Really Am. I still mymind and greet my courage. Here in my solitude I am not burdened bythoughts of the past. I have no fear of the future. I listen to theVoice of my soul inside me and I allow it to guide my life.I awaken to the sound of my life and feel my well-being as I placemyself in the hands of the One Spirit, God. The Consciousness thatbrought my Spirit here is the Consciousness that will guide me throughmy life - safely. My path is illuminated with pure white light as Itake my first step toward my authentic life.Every question I have is met with an answer when I still my mind tolisten. I trust in the message of my soul and my way is made clear.This day is the birth mother of tomorrow and I create my tomorrows bythe choices I make today. I know that I am fulfilling the dream thatwas always meant for me, as I take each step of my life forward withlove and courage.I bind myself to positive faith and allow the Power for good to surgearound and through me. I charge myself with radiant I Am light, andembrace all Power given to me from above and below. My courage dispelsthe limits and inhibitions of my past. I will live each day from thismoment on in accordance with the message from my soul and be liftedinto the future of myself. I am indeed blessed. And so it is.Maureen Moss

Your moment

When you sit in the midst of it all, and trust the unfolding of your life, quiet words will whisper into your soul and tell you where to go.   When you get quiet long enough… sometimes longer than you think you must,  you will find the path and the road to take to the present moment.   This is your day.  Right here and right now is your moment.  The only moment.  The only moment that matters.  Its here, it is yours… for the asking.

I am here to create a space

****

I am here to create a space.  My home is open to share with the people I love and the people that pass through my life.  

**

Who will share your time

Be where you are.
And give what you have to give.
Don’t worry that it is not good enough.  

People who need to receive what you have to give, will come to you.
People that need something else, maybe even something more advanced or more refined, will go to someone else.  There will also be people who are not ready to embrace what you have to offer. They too will pass and go.  
That is not a judgment of you or where you are at.  It simply is a matter of divine timing acting in the lives of many people.  
You are where you are meant to be at this time.   Be yourself and give of your gifts freely and with intuition.   You will know who is meant to share time with you.

follow your dreams

Goals are one dimensional… in the moment that you decide that the goal will be, it has life and energy to it, but often becomes a deadline and a vague and luminous expectation.   The life around you is not so stagnant and thus your dreams will do best, to also not be so stagnant.

When you set a goal, its best to give the goal a life of its own and let it evolve and change with each passing instance.  Those are the goals we love for the length of our strange progressions and unexpected detours.   The detours can be the unfolding of new dreamy delights … but we have to be willing to go there.    Follow your dreams….   yes follow your dreams… they are leading you….


Sometimes the best thing we can do, is to figure out what we DON’T  want to do.

sipping tea

Listen to the quiet voice inside

"To know how to choose a path with heart is to learn how to follow intuitive feeling."

-- Jean Shinoda Bolen

What ideas are teasing you these days?

Are you aware of any little gems floating around your consciousness these days? Charged little thoughts that beckon you to pay attention to them? Inspiration and intuition often bring powerful new ideas to us very subtly, very quietly. When you become aware of being teased by an idea, follow it!

"Get your ideas on paper and study them. Do not let them go to waste!"

-- Les Brown

July 10, 2006

Its very hard sometimes to know your own intuitions intentions.

I know there is a place in me that is full and does feel unsatisfied.  It is not careful or hesitant about life.   There is a place inside of me that is free and comfortable with all people and all affairs.   This is the part of me that I call up from my soul and into my life.  It is a truer me, untarnished with experiences in lack or despair.  

Sitting and writing everyday makes me a better person.  writing makes me happier than I am when I am not writing.
I sit with my music, my candle, my tea or coffee… and I wait.  It’s the waiting that is better than anything else.   Waiting for my true thoughts and feelings from the hours since last writing to come to the front.   And while all the inspiration, confusion, love, and passion come up from inside me I give birth to all the things that shouldn’t be kept inside a person.  

I guess I seem a little silly sometimes to people.   All my oddities.   I might tame them a bit if I thought I could.   But I often lack the self control of my self expression.   hahaha   That makes me laugh.  You know I am glad I lack self control of my self expression.   I like being unwilling to hold back.  I like being irrepressible and unyielding in my desire to share my self.  And if I throw in a little discernment in, I guess most of the time it serves me.  

I love people.  I love so many people.   Some drive me crazy for their insistence…and so I try not to do the same to others (when I can help it )    But most people delight me and I hope that I delight most people.  People expressing themselves makes me happy.   All their multicolored personalities and quirks.  I love their little funny things.  The shoes they choose to wear.  Like the woman I think of now… who wears here cute little heels even in the rain.    And my other friend who wears the same shoes, every single day and seems to have done so every single day for as long as I have known him.   And my friend who wears hats and scarves like a southern belle.  My friend who wears so many bright colors and has inspired me to find my color flare.
These people… they connect to something in me.   And even if I laugh at them a bit on occasion.  I love them so.   I love them for all their quirks and little delicious faults that make them human and beautiful to me.    

This morning I chose tea instead of coffee.   I felt calmer than coffee.  I have been drinking coffee every morning for the last year, and this morning I remembered a time when I didn’t do that.  I remembered a time when I didn’t wake up to an alarm clock, and didn’t need a jolt of hot black java to move me into action.    Sometimes even skipping the coffee all together.  Sometimes sipping tea instead.    Because I like it when the world moves at a slower pace.  I like it when I move by my inspirations and not my to do list.  I like to sit as long as I need to, until I can’t stand to sit any longer, and must must must get up and go attack my latest mind work.  
So today I sip tea instead and I anticipate a wonderful day filled with these things.   Have a great day world.  

You are Here

You are a wonderful human being. You are strong and capable of imagining, desiring, creating, and manifesting anything you want in your life. The life of God breathes in you and you are a reflection of divinity. Your soul is evolving and your life is changing in ways that you want.

Today is your day for taking one more step down the road of your choosing. You are here to create a life of wonder, and you are! You are here to create a life full of love, and you are!
You are here to be you, to let the shallow negative shells around your pure self fall to the ground beside you and melt away. You are evolving and growing into your destiny. This is your place in the world.

You are divine in spite of your failings. You are beautiful in spite of the ugly, defeating things that you expose your heart to over and over again. You are complete and whole from the inside out.
You are here today to live, to breathe, to walk forward in your life and explore its unfolding.

~leslie alison

again and again

Good morning little life.
I love you. I love making it back to you again and again and again.   Back to the soul of it all.  The heart of my life.  
And I meet you here… here on this paper with these words.  And the writing slows me and gets me here.   Always the music.  Always the candles.  Always the words.

Unafraid of the day.  Unafraid of all that will fall in between me and my greatest hopes.   They tumble in front of my like stones in the path.   And I run down the path and  jump over them, like hurdles, daily in pursuit of my ambitions.  Pursuit of my life’s greatest expression.    

This moring the music is from a yesterday of years ago.   Six years to be exact… but it sounds like music of just yesterday, 24 hours ago.   It trickles down into me and makes me feel like I am ok.   This music is just good to me.

Here’s to the day… here’s to staying on the path day after day after day.   Here’s to feeling like you are going no where and then waking up one day and realizing you are somewhere you never thought you would find.  

Soft Eyes on Me

I think there is more growing in me.   Growing  in a place that has always been plannted with rich seeds.  Now just accepting the raining waters and the healing sunlight and turning seed into crop.

Today is nice.   Today is gentle…. as are my eyes.  They have felt soft and gentle since yesterday sometime, when I got in this grooove.

Nova in the Sprinkler

 

Yesterday has created who we are today

Thought for the Day…

Yesterday has created who we are today.

Today is our chance to recreate.

My goals for tomorrow begin in my life right now… today.  

Beautiful Morning

beautiful morning
thank you for your gifts
thank you for your generosity

to my soul

the sun shines on my sidewalk and lights up the dew like
delicious berries on each leaf
makes me want to lick it up
taste it
get a little bit of the bite of this life
around me

this is my morning and
i am grateful

nothing to do yet
except look at the dew
and relax in this space

Give your Gift

Give your Gift

We all have a gift.  We all have a thing we are capable of doing Today.   With confidence.  With love.

I firmly belive that I am always in a position to mentor and be mentored.
There is always someone beside me that needs something I have to offer, and there is always someone beside me that can offer me what I am needing to receive.

New color

I am so happy to wake up this morning to a beautiful new color surrounding me. The "bleeding" red wallpaper is gone! Taylor said the walls looked to be bleeding with all those red swirly patterns all around us. Now I have indigo to inspire me while I work.

The weekend was good. I hope yours was too.
Its supposed to thunderstorm most of the beginning of this week. I don't think it looks much like thunderstorms out there this morning... but if it does rain... I am going to curl up on the couch and take a nap or read. Its a great day to relax rain or shine.

Cheers world. Drink up the goodness.

Empowered

Empowered.

Do you feel empowered to be who you are designed to be.
Do you feel empowered to live as you are already capable of living?
Or do you shrink.

Today I am grabbing on to the word empowered.
God's spirit breathes into me the power to make this body come alive. this heart come to love. this soul come to dance.
when I hold my breath and wait to be ordained with life, I am shrinking away from my greatest truth. I am already able to live. I am already here to give. I am already whole and completely present.

This is my truth today. So be it.
Amen.

Beat of a Different Drummer

I am so busy doing both absolutely fascinating and mundane things in life right now.
The hours of my days right now are completely full... to the max... the limit... with barely enough time to replenish myself. But just enough. Just enough because I KNOW that if I don't I won't keep going like this. And for at least a little bit longer I do want to keep going like this :)

So I am not writing much on here. I am still writing in my journal world. Because it is my personal writing reflection time that keeps me from going crazy.

The days and months will unfold to allow me more time with this creative endevour. I have my heart set on publishing more of my conversations with the universe.

For now... here's a link that a friend sent me today. I like it. Interesting. Check it out. http://keirsey.com/drummers.html

Wishing you ten thousand blessings...

new today

today is cold. i don't like it and so i will write in tiny uncapitolized letters to show how small and short and tiny and COLD i feel. i think i am shrinking into a frozen little ice cube. you know that feeling when you keep pulling in closer and closer to yourself in some strange attempt to mainting body heat.

ok. i will stop tying such strange and unusual things. i will not stop typing in lowercase though.
i will resist the urge.

its cold. its the first day of spring. and instead of having spring fever... i have spring freeezer.
its awful. i should be outside planting my morning glory seeds on the front side of the white picket fence (the one i want remove from our yard, but probably won't do until next fall.) instead of planting seeds i am slurping coffee at eastbongo and sitting on my coat because the chair is too cold. i can't complain... this is nice. very nice. but the latte would prefer it had been iced, had the temperatures not dropped so low.

"anything else i should say taylor?" i ask across the table
"what are you writing about" he says
"just stuff." i say

"tell them rivers run in circles" he says
and i stop the dialouge because this poetic idea he came up with today is really not working for me.

The question is not what are you going to do tomorrow, next weekend, with your life...

The question is what are you going to do TODAY?

To be really happy now.

What is inspiring you this very exact moment.
Do it.
Don't wait.
Taste your life right now.

You can put your mind in order

You can put your mind in order by focusing on one thing at a time, doing it well, and appreciating the opportunity that this doing offers.
You can put your life in order by admitting to yourself what you really want to experience, and taking one step at a time that will move you closer to that experience.
You can put your environment in order by clearing out the old, worn-out, broken, and useless things that are taking up space.
You can put your spirit in order by replacing fearful, doubtful, angry thoughts with thoughts about the grace of God, and by accepting that God’s purpose, plan and will for you is the orderly development of your soul’s identity.

~author unknown

ahhh sigh

ahhh.  sigh.  happy sigh.

There at least ten reflective pieces I could have written between last time I sat down and now.  But I never put them on paper.  They just danced around in my head.  
Today I am sitting here.
Starring at the wallpaper on the wall and thinking…hm… this is my life.
This is how its playing out.    I like it.

love the questions

I came across this today while unpacking a little box of favorite papers.
Its ringing in me today… so I wanted to share it with you again.

Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves like locked rooms and like books that are written in a very foreign tongue. Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is to live everything.
Live the questions now.
Perhaps you will then gradually without noticing it, live along some distant day into the answer.

~Rainer Maria Rilke

Its a nice morning

It’s a nice morning.

The cat’s tail is swishing to the beat of the music.
The espresso is a hot, potent, morning remedy.
There is a dusting of snow on the ground.
Last nights paintings are dry and waiting for me to play with them again.
All the bills are paid
with enough left over for a pound of good coffee.

Isn’t this a nice Sunday.

Waiting on the paint to dry

Waiting on the paint to dry..

I have been waiting on the paint to dry on my canvas.   I was painting for awhile and then realized I had to step away from it and let it dry.   If I don’t take this necessary step,   I end up with a very murky brown mess on the canvas.  

You can get a lot of good stuff done while waiting for the paint to dry.

That’s my thought for the day.

Little Devil on my shoulder .... perfection

I am often soo hard on myself. I want to do things perfect. Any one else like this??? Yeah I know you are out there. Here’s how it is for me.

I know its my ball and chain… carrying around this expectation to be giving forth my best allllllllll the time. That’s too much pressure, you know.

I unlock the ball often. I get free. I get expressive. I get unconcerned. for awhile. But my Perfectionism is always still lurking somewhere and probably always will be. I’ve made friends with its nature, but like all good enemies I don’t make friends enough to schedule dinner dates. I try to avoid Mrs. Perfect in me. I often tell the little meddler to hop off my shoulder and go take a nap! a long long nap.

SO today I am ranting to that perfectionistic little bully that climbs up there on my shoulder and whispers mean things in my ear. The little mini me that is a perfectionist. The little one that has been told by so many people in this world that everything has to be done RIGHT. or I am not ok.

Hey you- why do you think it has to be perfect. Its ok to be a mess. Its ok to tackle big stuff and do it all wrong in the process. So is this game. People can look. People can laugh. Is that what you are worried about? Try not to worry about that. People can watch you make messes of your life as your trying. If you can get past all that (which is truly a short sentence but a long process) Then you can make more than messes. You can stumble over the messes. Hide the messes in the closet. Or take the messes and slowly turn them in to works of art. I mean I personally find it very hard to paint if I am not allowed to get paint everywhere. In fact I don’t enjoy it if I can’t get some paint on my hands and shirt and the floor and the …. well the canvas.

See you can’t create anything unless you engage with it. Get in it. Right in the middle of it produces the best results. And that can be messy. that process can be full of imperfections.

Yeah… so I tell her that today. And right now she is sleeping. The little devil is sleeping. Ahhh… I can run off and do something imperfect and love it!! I can experiment and tear things up and paint on the walls if I want for the sake of exploration. I can try my best and not care if my best doesn’t impress anyone. I can create things and not care if it doesn’t meet someone elses standards. I can do it out of pure joy. pure love. purest intention.

Habits

Habits.  
How do I form my lifestyle?  Around my habits.
My soul’s best intentions can be helped or hindered by my daily habits.
I woke up this morning thinking about how crucial all this is to my experience of a day. Our move has transplanted me into a new existence.   Much is the same.   I see my small possessions around me.   The little things I have collected here and there…the little pieces that tell stories about me.  But the big stuff around me has all changed.   I always say- “Its amazing… you want to see what you amount to, just move.”  Packed away, as tightly as possible in boxes your stuff shows it’s self as a meaningless accumulation of unsubstantial size.   For all the hard work our society puts in to acquire material possessions, we really have so little to hang on to.  It’s good to see that and know.  

So I sit here in a new house, with my old stuff, and a transformed life.
It’s not the old or the new that I see around me, it’s the old and the new that I feel within me.

My habit for mornings has changed since I have moved into this house.  I am sleeping in a bit later.  And that’s good for me.   Good for the overachiever who has the tendency to take out the trash while drinking morning coffee.  Good for the girl who tries to meditate while writing the grocery list.  (Not the meditating while writing the grocery list is bad if you can handle that kinda thing. )   But it’s good for this girl who does too much and misses the slow stuff too often to change her habits.
Transition helps that process along, I guess.   New habits are forming.

This time here, with the dawn, in my room, with my coffee and silence is doing good in me.  Moving with less haste and more deliberate consciousness.  Not hurrying as much to move faster, but going farther.  Farther in my soul.  Farther in my efforts to be more substantial.   To acquire more wealth in my soul than in boxes.

Let my habits sink into me.  Let them become unstoppable habits.  Let these rituals towards peace be more and more a piece of my character, undetached from who I am.  

Until tomorrow morning….
  

You captivate me

You captivate me
You inspire me
you convince me of my inclination towards creating
something more
Powerful
more Intense
Something heavy resting on my chest
In my soul
In each breath I am taking today
I am thinking of you
and wondering if I can get inside of you

Open the doors to your chest
And let me climb in
Open up and close me inside of you
For awhile
My love

Take me in
And rub your self into me
Shine me with a layer of your self
Polish me
With who you are today
And I will be a better person

I will be more of me
and a touch of you
I am better for knowing you
Better for being beside you
Still myself
add a reflection of you
you who came by me
on my way
to today

Open my soul

Open my soul
Letting everything judgement of me out
Not caring who I am
Being who I am
From the core
Not colored
Not painted
No texture
No race

This is a feeling
A haze that has meaning

Resting
With movement all around me
Nothing to do but soak it up and
Let it pour back out when it reaches the top

~Reflections after going to a drum circle last night and dancing to the beat of the music